Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
