Umm I'm too high to move.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He explained how that handle got into our fridge. I think i'm going to stick with my original assumption that the vodka gods want me to drink more vodka.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
this is an emotional support booty call
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Randomize