What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
should i be that dick who brings a carpet in an uberpool
Why are you moving a carpet?
it's unimportant
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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