Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
im drinking this country out of the recession.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Randomize
