My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
Sacagawea was the original milf.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
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