I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
