this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
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