I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
