lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
