i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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