Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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