Your dad touched me again.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
