I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
