you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
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I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Just had a heart to heart with my John Belushi poster.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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