Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Just received a visit from the Ghost of Bad Decisions Past. Kind of weird 90% of the flashbacks happened in the same sixteen month span, the rest happened at Taco Bell.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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