the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
