Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
