; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Just accidentally flashed my junk to the lady helping me try on suits, it was cold in there, I don't think she was impressed.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Randomize
