I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
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Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.
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If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?