i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
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