Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
