I'm really into asian looking animals
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
It's official drugs can't kill me
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
