this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
