I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Congratulations! We have a period
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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