No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
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