If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
