Is it normal to miss your booty call?
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Randomize
