No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
