Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize