I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
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she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
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Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!