And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
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Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
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hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.