Having a random hookup so left but love u
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
