So I fucked an Aussie broad with huge feeders last nite 2x... Before banging her she was blowin me & I thought: "SHE IS GOIN DOWN-UNDER ON ME". Laughed out loud
1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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