He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
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No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize