Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
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