Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Randomize