We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
