is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I just gargled with NyQuil
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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