Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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