Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
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