oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize