Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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