hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
