mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
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