you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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