xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
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She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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