if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Beans, may the odds of a nip slip and drunken make out session be ever in your favor
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize