Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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