I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
smell my finger.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
