I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
WHY DOES GOD HATE MY DICK
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
