i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
