I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
